Christmas in the 21st Century is not quite the same

I don’t often look over old columns, but the other day I came across one about the perfect Christmas. Keep in mind that column was written almost thirty years ago. Whether we like it or not, Christmas has changed, families have changed, and the media representation of a “family Christmas” is nothing like it was in 1992 or back in 1962 which was referenced in the column.

At one time, Christmas cards were a big deal. We kept a list of the cards we got each year, so that cards could be sent to those same people the next year. Cards were hung around the living room. Mother kept a list in the back of the address book in the telephone table in the hall.

Old television specials of the time had nothing to do with a beautiful, single, young woman coming to the country to find peace and quiet… only to find a plaid shirted, booted, handsome man who was recently widowed, with maybe a child who needed a mother. Divorce wasn’t mentioned in family television shows in the 50s. Our Christmas Dramas were different, too. Every year, we watched It’s a Wonderful Life one Saturday night in December and A Christmas Carol on the Saturday right before Christmas. We’d throw in A Miracle on 34th Street and The Bishop’s Wife.

This was also a time of Perry Como and Andy Williams. Perry Como and Lawrence Welk used their usual studios to scatter fake snow, invite in the families of the cast and sing a lot of old songs. Andy Williams took us all to the mountains where he and his beautiful French wife Claudine welcomed in the Osmond boys and other regulars. I don’t think the snow was real, but it looked real as each group came bustling through the door clad in coats and warm sweaters to sing favorites. We don’t have variety shows like they used to. America’s Got Talent and Dancing with the Stars come about as close to those shows as possible.

Situation comedies of the time told us what the “real world” had. We, the middle-class American families, didn’t have huge trees and fluffy bows. We had real trees that Daddy had to thumbtack to the wall to keep it from falling over. We had presents wrapped in flimsy paper and tied with that thin ribbon that could be curled with the scissors.

Even after I married, my family would bundle up and drive to my parents for the day. There was hardly room for all of us in the house at once, and most of the television at that time included football games. We watched out children play outside getting to see their cousins during the once or twice a year when they came together. Unlike Andy Williams neighbors, we didn’t wander around the night before and sing songs. We went home the next day with leftovers, gossip, and memories.

Although some families still drive in for the big weekend, most of us have to make do with what we can. I’ve given up the hosting job for Christmas and will travel if invited. One of my daughters is coming the week after Christmas to celebrate with her in laws and me. The little grandkids will reap gifts from Santa on Christmas morning at home. The other daughter has invited me to come over on Christmas day. The two sets of teenage girls will be arriving from their “other” parents that afternoon. I’m really looking forward to it. The girls are growing up and will scatter within the next few years. We’ve got to make the most of it, even if we don’t have time for one of the old Christmas movies or a singalong with Andy Williams.